I thing there are a few words that i could change out for other words...
My first word:"Nan" a nickname, (with the exception for teachers) for my twin sister that has stuck with her ever since she could speak. My mother, Laurie Swiler, has always told me how I was a "kicker" when I was in her stomach. However it is always a mystery to what or who that was. That thing I was kicking happened to be my best friend, my twin sister, Natalie. Since the day the kicking stopped and we came out of my mom's stomach, 18 long minutes apart, we have always been "tightly knit". There have been three main steps in our lives, our childhood, adulthood and siblinghood. These steps are all put into the equation to describe why she is the most important person in my life as well as my best friend.
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2 comments:
Not bad, makes me want to read more. The whole "equation" sentence makes sense but I had to read it twice to figure it out.
Nice job, in the one sentence about who the kicker was, it might be more clear if you tkae out the word "what"
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